How to deal with difficult PT clients

The 3 Strike Approach

A classic concept from baseball: 3 strikes and you’re out. Interestingly, in bowling, 3 strikes in a row is called a “Turkey.” Now that we’ve piqued your interest with that bit of trivia, let’s explore how to apply this principle when dealing with clients.

The basic approach follows these three stages:

Strike 1 – Support and Clarification “How can I best help you? Is there anything more I can do for you? I want to ensure you don’t feel lost and that you achieve your desired results.”

Strike 2 – Collaboration and Problem-Solving “How do you think we ought to approach this? What can we do together to help you improve [insert specific problem]?”

Strike 3 – Accountability and Action Planning “How are you going to change/apply [insert behavior or desired action] moving forward?”

As you can see, these questions represent a gradual yet deliberate shift in responsibility. Let’s break down the process:

1. First Strike: Initially, it’s our duty as coaches to shoulder the responsibility. We may have missed something or not fully understood our client’s needs or communication style. By asking what more they need or want from us, we aim to get the client to explain where they need help and how we can best provide it.
2. Second Strike: If the client is still bringing up the same issues despite you providing what they said they needed, it’s time to address the secondary struggle within the same premise. At this point, you can reference your previous discussion and ask if they’ve used or applied what you both previously discussed and they directly asked for. This can reveal one of two things: a) They didn’t apply themselves b) They didn’t really know what help to ask for initially, but now they do The second scenario is common, which is why the second strike focuses on mutual effort and interdependence, allowing you to guide and the client to grow.
3. Third Strike: If the client hasn’t applied themselves, they move to this stage. Here, you need to establish what they are prepared to do and have them document it. They need to accept and take responsibility at this stage, as it’s the only way they will break their cycle of dependence.

Important Note: If an entirely new issue arises, the strike count starts over.

This approach is focused on empowering people to make their own choices deliberately. While we could do all the thinking for them, it may not help in the long run. This method promotes personal growth and self-efficacy.

By using the 3 Strike Approach, you create a structured framework for client interactions that balances support, collaboration, and personal responsibility. It allows for flexibility in addressing client needs while gradually shifting the onus of action onto the client, fostering their independence and growth.

Judgement and the fitness industry

Humans in their nature are highly judgemental creatures.

Even though you’ll hear plenty say – “I’m not a judgemental person.” or “I don’t judge people.”

Their sentiment is a noble one, however the reality based on observing behaviours, actions, choices made and other such things reveal these pleasant words are little more exactly that, pleasant words.

We developed the ability to judge/access a situation for the purposes of survival.

In the world of fitness there’s a lot to see and engage with.

Hop onto any social media platform and you’ll find an almost infinite amount of content that is potentially staged, filtered to the nth degree, straight up fabrication because of powerful AI or perhaps just a really good angle for a photo.

This causes various people to take to the comments section.

There will be admiration, bullying and everything in-between because when we see something that is too good to be true (which it often is) we’re likely to question it.

Anyone who achieves anything noteworthy will be judged for it because that’s how life works.

People will aim to discern if they were naturally gifted through great genetics, had an easy ride because of favourable life circumstance or perhaps cheated through the use of PED’s etc.

It’s worth understanding all of these opinions and judgements are valid.

Often there will have been a lot of hard work, effort and sacrifice that’s gone into to achieving whatever the individual facing the hammer of justice has on offer for all to see.

A lot of folk won’t want to reveal their entire story because of this.

Usually people feel ashamed of the extremes they went to or the sacrifices they made, and there might be even more internal strife because of the ‘extra’ methods they perhaps had access to (and used) to climb the mountain before them.

I’ve come to observe that those who do fully open up and are honest get roasted to oblivion.

Personally I deeply respect those who will be honest and how they got to the place they’re in.

What I judge harshly for is those that omit the truth for the sake of saving face and leading people astray with the idea that such heights can be achieved without specific factors/circumstances being met.

There’s no shame in telling the truth, social media has created this modern problem.

Understand that in life you will always be judged and if your in the fitness industry that will increase 10 fold, maybe.

Don’t seek to defend yourself when you get judged or critiqued harshly.

Instead ask this question – What makes you think (or say) that?

Seek to understand why a person judges as they do because chances are there’s a good reason for it and perhaps in showing them a little patience and curiosity you might be able to learn something from them.

I’ve judged a lot of people, and from my eyes it was driven by the desire to know the truth.

Why in the past would I think someone was lying or hiding something that helped them achieve what they did?

Honestly…. because it’s something I would do if I was in their position.

What would make omit/hide the full process, because of the thought that people would simply attribute any success or achievement to those things and discount all the effort, sacrifice, struggle and suffering that was the bedrock to it all.

And while that’s only the view from my eyes, I don’t think it’s that far off for others as well.

But we grow in age and experience to the point where we simply don’t hold that same fear.

So now I say this – Let people judge and judge them all the same. Then laugh, take a breath and observe what it is within you that causes those specific judgements to be cast because they’ll help you learn a lot about yourself because in the end you’re not really judging the other person, you’re judging yourself against them because you feel…. well, that’s for you to find out.

Gentlemen who started lifting later in life, say 40+

Firstly, most of you are smashing it, good work for that. 

I’m curious to know one thing though. 

What made you decide to take up the road of iron at this time?

From those I personally know it was due to either one or a combination of these reasons:

• They saw a photo of themselves and felt disgusted with the state they had gotten in to 
• A medical scare (heart issues, hyper tension)
• Divorce, they now had time to get 70’s big 
• Injury from a daily task that gave a hefty wake up call as to how physically weak they’d become 
• Not being able to do something they ‘thought’ they could still do/do easily (lifting something, running after kids etc)

I noticed all of these had a strong emotion behind them.

This is essentially where we get our creative oomph from. 

Without something from this place fuelling our endeavours we won’t do much, emotional energy is creative enegery, when utilised that is. 

If left unchecked it’s likely to become self destructive. 

Funnily enough this  links to the aforementioned reasons as to why most men in later life start lifting. 

Many swap booze for barbells and debauchery for deadlifts. 

Being that we are heavily emotion beings it’s not a surprise that not much happens regarding change unless there is a tidal wave of energy from one of what are called ‘lower emotions’ – shame, guilt apathy, grief, fear, desire, anger and pride.

Not to say that’s always the case, it’s just common. 

Given the above I’d genuinely like to know what got you lifting. 

Help expand my limited knowledge/perspective in understanding those of us afflicted with this human condition.

Feedback is like a wasp at times.

How so?

Honest feedback tends to sting a bit

Many will say they welcome it with open arms, the more honest the better. 

But in my experience what they’re really after is a compliment.

Now upon stating this the common knee-jerk reaction is for folk to deny it by saying something to the affect of – “Oh yea, others will be like that. But not me. I really do like the brutally honest stuff that makes me better.”

Let’s drop the false pretence for just a second. 

NO ONE likes hearing feedback that isn’t positive

It hits us in our pride.

And as a result there will be some kind of denial/delusion to cope.

Although if you really look at what happens it’s closer to the 5 stages of grief because we need to accept that a potential version of ourselves we thought had it all worked out may have been wrong, thus needing to have that idea metaphorically be laid to rest.

The ones many know are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. 

I’ve read the two additional stages are ‘initial shock’ being the starting point of it all, which makes sense. 

Then we have a stage before acceptance, testing. 

In that place we’re dipping our toe back into the water to ensure it’s safe enough to get in and continue swimming along. 

Take a moment to see how you react to feedback.

Not how you think you react that has you being the pinnacle of humility and grace, how you really react. 

While it’s true enough that as we get older there’s more leaning towards this ideal response – listening, accepting, taking action. 

That takes a lot of time to cultivate for most people. 

True enough you might be the exception, but I doubt it.

Don’t feel back for reacting less than favourable to feedback that stings, you’re only human after all and it’s okay to act as such

So this leads me to a question. 

What feedback have you had that left quite the inintal wound but was exactly what you needed to hear?

Please do share your thoughts below.

Risk and Reward, is it worth it?

Based on popularity and the traditional gym mentality these seem to be the ‘go to’ upper body lifts

Bench Press – dumbbells or bar
Rows – dumbbells or bar
Lat Pull Down 
Curls & Push Downs 

These are all fair movements.

But how long will these be the staples before the cost outweighs the benefit?

Since not being able ot use my left arm there’s been a hefty chunk of reflection going on.

I love lifting in a classic gym environment.

Although even with this being the case I’ve come to see the limitations and issues that inevitably arise for the majoirty.

Personally there’s not been anyone of this ilk who’s injury free. 

Usually from something along the lines of too much of the same, or pushing for a PB at a pace that wasn’t wise just becuase they wanted to hit a certain number

Obviously we were all younger and less bright once upon a time.

As such the desire to fit in took over, resulting in life long niggles that come back to say hello.

Now I don’t think there’s many forms of 100% risk free training.

I’ve known those from all walks to pick up a niggle they’d perfer to have avoided, however it’s just what happens. 

We push a little too far, for too long and learn our limit.

My own lessons came from going down the minimalistic route.

It was simple, fun and most importantly – rewarding. 

You see we will do more of what we perceive is giving us what we want, even if there’s warnings from our more experienced peers because at that moment we saw the risk as worth it. 

Hindsight ususally reminds us otherwise 

Those who lift get told to stretch more to prevent strains or worse, they don’t.

Those who stretch a lot are encouraged to lift for strength/support, they dont.

Those who love cardio get reminded to do both of the above to. prevent injury, they don’t.

Can you see a pattern here?

One of the main reasons for many not doing things they may need to is fear because it’ll mean potentially sacrificing some time of what they love to do, for what htey need to do. 

Very few are humble or wise enough to accept this and apply it. 

Most need a few siginificant injuries before they will take action. 

Even then it’s not enough for certain folk to adapt things. 

Circling back to the ‘go to’ upper body lifts, while I love how htey are focused on lifting external loads (becuase that will make us stronger in record time), I’ve come to shift my own view a lot of late. 

I rarely did high rep work that was preached by body builders.

It was all <5 because that is what I enjoyed and gave me what I wanted, at now the cost of tendon health becuase of the excess tension/stiffness they stockpiled to transfer the force needed at the time. 

Now I see the the value in lighter loads with higher reps.

Especially bodyweight focused elements, because they feel good and right. 

Hitting more reps to get a decent amount of blood flowing while working into longer ranges of motion very much agrees with my own body currently. 

But… there’s always a butt

A part of me still wants to lift as I did, in the way I did. 

And while I can indeed do this, it comes at a hefty cost of around 3-5 days of inflamed & nasty tension in areas that were starting to regain utility.

It really is funny how the longer we do anything the more we ask this very specific question:

Is it worth it? 

Some honest thought can reveal the best answers.

While we might have an knee-jerk reaction that says ‘yes’, we can then ask ourselves why it’s a yes and keep going to pick apart what is driving our thought process.

Only speaking for myself, it’s often a bad choice to say yes. 

I know better, and the one deep within knowns this. 

It’s just the superficial one still clinging on to what was that struggles, becomes emotional and doesn’t want to let go because through force ‘what was’ can still be ‘what is’, but at a cost. 

And that price just isn’t worth paying, honestly. 

So I have a question for you. 

What do you still love within regards to training that you know isn’t worth the cost you will pay to do it

This can apply to life too, so I’d really like to hear your answers.