Monthly Archives: September 2018
Do you collect fitness badges of honour?
Many people do, they come in the form of being the one to work the hardest in class, staying in the gym the longest, running further than the person next to you on the treadmill and many other arbitrary things that do nothing to help you progress.
Picture this, you may have done it.
You go in to the gym, walk to a treadmill, across the gym you see someone else stepping on one directly opposite at the same time and in that moment your mind is made up, challenge accepted.
Both of you proceed to start running.
You look at their cadence trying to gauge if they’re going faster than you, if they are you will set yours just above theirs and come hell or high water you will not be getting of the treadmill first, even if it kills you.
The focus has taken over, you’re in the zone.
Perhaps you beat them easily and thus feel quite accomplished with yourself, maybe they crank up the speed and leave you in the dust, or by some miracle you both stop at the same time, who knows what will happen, so long as you can claim your badge, it doesn’t matter.
We touched on the mentality of ‘more is not better, it’s just more’ yesterday, it is something I truly wish for you to let go of because for the majority (which is where you fall if you’re reading this), it’s not worth it.
Each one of us wants to make god progress, more so we want to feel accomplished in something, to collect a trophy, even if only in our own mind.
Being the complex creatures we are it is common for us to seek a reward as recompense for all that we suffer.
We may even share the treadmill story with some friends or family members in the hope of awe and adulation from them, which we may get at the start, however it’s of a false variety because they don’t really care, after all, would you if the roles were reversed?
There is too much put on other people to fulfil our emotional needs, yes that is what badges of honour are when you delve in to them.
Why do I say this?
Simple, you will have someone you want to tell about your achievement, you want their praise, their approval, their emotional scraps and gentle nod that you’re worthy.
I get it, we all want that, however before obtaining that from other people can mean anything of substance we must first be able to self praise, to recognise that more often than not the only person who really cares is us.
Well, maybe your mum too, she’d always be proud, as such I suggest you go buy her flowers right this instant.
So back to the badges of honour, why do you collect them?
Is it for yourself or for someone else, sit and think about your answer because reflection is a key element in growth.
Now relate the badges (old, current and yet to collect) and how they will help you work towards your goal, do you have faith in achieving your goal and enough drive and self efficacy to get it or are you waiting for permission?
I know you will achieve your goal when you really want it, you’ve got everything it takes to do so, multiple badges or not, you will do it eventually.
Give the above some thought, go, reflect and have a productive day.
Psychology truly is fascinating.
It’s especially interesting to give it some thought while sat pretentiously drinking coffee, because that’s the sign of true intellect, apparently 😂
Take 5 minutes and listen to what people are talking about around you, if possible try to find the ones who are discussing their stress and reaction to said stress.
What habits do they give in to?
Are there any childish reactions?
Is their continued suffering really worth that extra slice of cake?
It’s not uncommon that people are emotional eaters.
Even when you try to be helpful and provide guidance that will steer them in the direction health & longevity, they will still have a retort akin to “Oh, well everything in moderation.”.
No, just no.
Did you know that some people can’t do moderation, and that there are others who really need to stop putting their hand int he cookie jar because of declining health.
These mindsets of “You deserve a treat, you’ve been good.” are drummed in to us as children.
Yep, parents use sweet and certain foods as punishment, reward, basically tools to control a child’s behaviour and this is where many develop a warped mindset with food as it becomes their comfort, their friend, their torturer, their master.
I’m sure some will read this and get offended, because people are quite weak mentally these days and claim that they enjoy the taste of foods, etc etc.
To those people, guess what, everyone (or most people) enjoy food, however if you proceed to eat like an idiot with not a thought to your health you will pay the price in the long run, if you’re not already paying it and it all starts with the psychology of how people relate to food.
Food is just food, it is not something that should control you and if it does then you may wish to seek out some guidance to overcome this and take back control and realise you’re the master.
Personal question for you, have you ever had an eating disorder?
An alarming amount of people have at one stage or current do, so don’t feel you’re alone, there are plenty of others who understand the peace you’re in.
If you also know this, what keeps you in it?
To me this is the fascinating part, because many often choose to stay in a vicious and potentially abusive cycle, because the pain of living any other way seem too great.
Is that how you feel?
Food can have quite the hold over people, I would know.
Food was never used as a tool to control my behaviour as a child so I didn’t grow up with any particular affinity to a food (junk or otherwise), my own personal issue came from being in a highly competitive field that required weight monitoring, again the food itself wasn’t the issue.
Over time various things were learnt, one being a family predisposition (fathers side) to Gluten, most of them have Celiac, this poisoned my mind because it gave me something to latch on to, a logical excuse for not doing certain things, not eating certain foods, basically a reason to become neurotic.
As you can imagine a tricky relationship with food started to develop, this caused various issues in both mental health, physical health along with putting quite the strain on relationships.
Of course at the time it’s never us that is the problem, or the way we eat, nor the way we think, it’s everyone else who does’t understand. We become so enamoured with what we know or rather feel we know that we stop listening to anything that doesn’t fit the narrative we want it to fit.
A dangerous and lonely place to be, so much so that we seek out people in a similar place, that say similar things and it makes us much worse for it.
Think of it like this, where is the worst place for a meth addict to be?
Surrounded by others who hold the attitude of “It’s okay, I need it, we need it, why should we let them take it away from us, it’s ours, our precious.” – extreme example, however one that is easy to understand.
It is hard to break away from a particular mindset by surrounding yourself with people who also think that way, doing that is only going to further confirm the bias that what is being done is okay, when it might be quite harmful to us, again, a place I’ve personally been in.
The only way to move forwards is to speak to those people that perhaps anger or frighten us, not the ones that pander to our biases.
Overtime sense was seen and a swift realisation came.
To be more than we are, we must be prepared to accept the pain of change and seek out those that will tell us what we don’t want to hear as that is often what we need to hear.
While their is comfort in the familiar, just because it si comfortable it doesn’t mean it’s any good for you.
Anyway, enough of that reminiscing.
Share your thoughts, not what you think people want to hear mind you, YOUR thoughts and what food means to you and if possible where you feel this attitude came from.
I look forwards to reading them.