Tag Archives: life lesson
What will be your New Years Promise?
Yep promise, not resolution.
You see the former means more and is not so easily broken.
The latter on the other hand, we’ve been binning those off for years without any consequence or second thought because it’s the expectation that it will happen.
Our history will often define our future.
Your history will often define your future, is that what you want?
One of the best indicators of a persons future performance is to look at all their past ones because you will see a trend, a pattern.
Of course people can change, people do change.
Not that much though.
Do you want to be something more than your history or are you happy with living the same life on repeat, much like Bill Murray in Groundhog Day.
We all get stuck in a loop from time to time.
It’s a far more comfortable place to be, I can personally attest to this because it’s so much easier to stay in a place we feel safe, protected and emotionally satiated.
That’s often what it comes down to in the end.
We all want to feel something, something nice, warm, fuzzy and generally safe.
There is nothing wrong with this you know.
If that is the life you choose and make that choice willing without hesitation or any ambiguousness then you my friend are someone very rare indeed because you’re someone who knows themselves.
I can’t help but respect that deeply.
Say that isn’t you and there is a deep sense of longing, wanting more, yearning for something you can’t quite place your finger on, then this is worth exploring further.
Ask yourself this –
‘What am I searching for? & Why am I searching for this?’
You don’t need to share it with anyone, it’s for you to know and act on if that is your decision.
Half the battle is knowing.
The other half, doing.
To achieve this, in 2020, instead of making a new years resolution try something a little different instead.
Make yourself a New Years Promise.
There are a lot of things to remember when it comes to making progress in life.
Well, at least that’s what most would have you think.
Over the years these have been the glaring consistencies:
– Master the basics
– Failure is the best teacher
– More is rarely better, it’s just more
In regards to the first point, if you are looking at it in a fitness sense you’ll not really need more than the basics and while all the other options available are nice, they’re not necessary.
Squats, Presses, Pulls, Loaded Carries & Moving.
You don’t need much more from the gym, the rest you can gain outside of 2-3 sessions per week by partaking in various hobbies.
Life doesn’t need to be spent living in the gym.
A lesson it took me many failures to learn because of doing too much for too long and not getting anywhere that is where understanding less done better yields greater results than more just for the sake of more.
Live wise the above got in the way of experiencing it.
It’s a place many fall into, especially when they feel that by changing their look to gain more confidence, attention and self-love will be the answer, which of course it never is.
The reason for that is a simple one.
Just because you change who you are on the outside that doesn’t mean it will even scratch what you are on the inside.
The gym doesn’t change who you are, you do.
The gym is meant to help improve your life, not consume it.
If you’ve spent year in there training away and still feel no better in who you are then you’ve merely exchanged on prison and place to hide for another.
By all means train, move well, look good on the outside.
Just be sure to live and grow on the inside too.
In a world where everyone is now special, needs a cuddle and has to have everything just as they need it otherwise a safe space, blanket and glass of warm milk are required, we’re truly becoming detached from reality.
Don’t get me wrong, or do, it doesn’t really matter.
Being inclusive and trying to appeal to a wide audience isn’t the devil, however it is leading to people putting feelings above what is perhaps needed or practical.
While feelings matter if we don’t ever learn to deal with the uncomfortable ones we can’t grow as a person.
Too much people now and everything spoon fed to them.
The regression to a childlike attitude in the growing population of adults is frightening because as time goes on and the larger majority become mentally softer it leaves the door wide open for nasty things to happen.
Without hardship you can’t develop a level of toughness required to survive.
You can see it in fitness across the modern world.
Pandering, kid gloves, pointless praise and more.
It’s the adult equivalent to pinning up a child’s picture of a macaroni owl on the fridge and saying – “Wow, this is so GOOD” when in truth you know it’s a piece of shit that looks nothing like an owl and that it was made in the dark using their feet, yet you say it does to protect their feelings.
Yet you teach a child that for something else to go on the fridge it needs to be better than this… ‘owl’…. tough as it might be it helps the child grow and start to appreciate the need for standards, effort and ‘good work’.
Praise is only given when deserved, it shouldn’t be on tap.
If it is then it means nothing.
These days though there can’t be any negativity because negativity (constructive criticism) is the devil!
It’s not you know, it’s a necessary and essentially part of life.
Being all inclusive and trying to cater for everyone (in fitness) is the same as leaving the tap of praise running.
We need structure, we need levels of hierarchy (yes, I said it) because this helps uphold a standard and allows for people and the industry to grow.
Why lie to people and tell them they’re doing well when in reality their standard/quality of fitness/result is akin to that of the macaroni owl.
True enough everyone starts somewhere.
This doesn’t mean that we bring down everyone else level/standard to appease the bottom feeders.
Dragging everyone else down to make others feel better is backwards, this is why inclusivity and catering for everyone is destroying fitness and even overall standards across the broad scale of life, in my opinion anyway because that’s all these ramblings are.
While many won’t agree that people need to find a level or as some say ‘their place’ in the world, without such things in place to sort the wheat from the chaff and provide the protectors and people who will do what is needed, the door will be left wide open for some nasty things to come through it without any resistance.
What do you think?
Please do share your thoughts below.
Are you in control of your emotions or are they in control of you?
Seems like a simple enough question to answer, it’s not.
You’d be surprised how many folk don’t really want to delve in to deep in to the emotional dregs that are weighing them down to find out which is the one causing all the other to pile up.
It’s surprisingly easy o know if someone is ruled by logic or feeling in a situation.
They either respond (logical) or they react (emotional).
Their tone of voice, pace, pitch, words spoken and often posture will give this away, not to mention some people faces just can’t lie.
Personally I’m like this, if something is utter tripe my face will let my fellow chatter companion know.
Another interesting bit of information about emotional reactions; it happens because it’s our egos way of protecting itself from death.
Yep, our ego fears its own death most.
Passional emotional reactions can usually end up linked to this, along with beliefs, values and occasionally a persons self proclaimed identity.
Don’t get me wrong, we need such things.
Without emotion we’d be no better than machines.
That being said, they can get in the way and control people for many years, a lifetime in some cases.
We link emotion to everything we do, literally
Once you can understand how and more importantly why then you will have a very powerful set of skills to help not only yourself but countless others as well.
Let us take food for example.
You will have a specific food that links to a specific emotion/feeling and when you’re not getting said emotion/feeling you will dive straight into the cupboard/fridge/freezer to pull out your crutch for that hit of instant gratification & feeling.
We subconsciously know this as well.
Why else do you think we ask people if they feel better after they’ve eaten?
We don’t ask them – “Are you nutritionally sustained from your meal?”.
No, we ask them how they feel and it they feel that they need any more or anything else.
Listening to the way people talk is an incredible skill.
Allowing each word to settle in your mind while also observing all the idiosyncrasies can really help you understand a person.
First though you must understand yourself.
“Because, if you can’t love yourself how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?Can I get an Amen?” – RuPaul
Give some though to the above, are you in control of your emotions or re they in control of you?