Tag Archives: confidence

You aim too low

How is your training going?
 
I bet your answer is ‘F**king epic!’.
 
Well, at least I hope it is.
 
This pursuit of a better version of oneself is something that captivates many.
 
One things I’ve noticed over the years though is the level of denial many will have about what it is they want to achieve.
 
What do I mean by this?
 
Simply that people will put limits on telling people what they want to achieve, and perhaps even go so far as to tell themselves the same things.
 
I’ms sure you’ve heard people or perhaps you yourself have said things like this:
 
“I don’t want to get too big, it’s not a good look for me.”
 
“I’m not interested in being ripped, I just want to lose some weight.”
 
“Losing weight doesn’t bother me, I’m doing if for health.”
 
While the above may be true, I’ve often found when talking to people that not to be the case and these self limiting views come from a couple of main places.
 
1 – Not wanting to se the bar high and fail to reach it
 
2 – They don’t want to be viewed as vain or narcissistic.
 
Both of the above as you can see are based on worrying about what everyone else will think.
 
A vicious cycle many fall in to.
 
We put a lot of stock in the opinions of other people, even if we claim we don’t.
 
Many need to approval of the group.
 
This isn’t a bad thing you know, it’s human nature.
 
The only problem with it these days is that the group is no longer a small one, it’s potentially in the thousands.
 
Just look at Instagram models, they need to keep their audience happy otherwise, poof, gone and forgotten.
 
In our earliest days our groups would be small, simply because of the way we lived. The tribe was much smaller, as such the opinions we needed for validation was only a select few in number.
 
Not now though.
 
Now we need to appease the mob,sad times.
 
Talking about goals and appeasing the mob, what are yours?
 
What physical prowess do you wish to achieve?
 
As a youngster, like many I wanted to become a fighter, to have that look, that athletic ability, essentially the classic martial arts physique.
 
Luckily my inner circle has always been just one person in size, I guess there is benefit to being an outcast.
 
How big is yours?
 
Knowing this will lead you to understand just how much approval you need in regards to your goals.
 
Also give some though to your goals.
 
Are they set at a low level so that you have an acceptable margin for failure or have you decided to aim high because bollocks to what everyone else thinks?
 
Food for thought.
 
Enjoy,
Ross

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You’re Not Alone

Body Confidence Issues…

Have you or are you plagued by them?

These issues are becoming more and more common, or at least more openly spoken about because they’re more accepted in our modern times.

    It can be hard to accept that we are not the people we once were and as a result we need to let go of certain demons that we have held onto so that we can move forwards to a better place.

Nutrition often plays a large part when it comes to body confidence issues, usually because people have come from a place (being overweight for example) and stripped out lots of foods and perhaps lost a large amount of weight in what is a less than optimal way. These people then become enamoured with fear because they don’t want to go backwards, thus developing a negative association with food. Not to mention they still seem themselves as they always did or they still have the negative words from people floating around (bullying is often common), the can’t shake the image of what they were, even if they are now what they desired to be initially.

When it comes to a negative self image we are sorry to say that there is no magic pill that we can offer. You have to find it in yourself to let go of the negative thoughts and learn to be happy for what you have achieved, even if people who once told you you weight too much and to lose weight are now saying your too thin and to gain weight, just ignore them. You must love you for who you are and be happy for yourself. Stop letting the influence of others (positive or negative) have so much hold over you, accept the positive, dismiss the negative to jealousy and never forget that how you look, what you do or what others think do not define you as a person. Be proud of your achievements.

Mental health and how it is affected is not spoken about enough in the realms of fitness, or that’s how many feel anyway. Fitness is like a pendulum, it starts one end and swings right tot he other, it’s different for everyone but just remember that it will level out eventually. This post is not to ‘cure’ this problem because it will be done differently for each individual, it’s simply want to make you aware that you’re not alone because lots of people feel the same and we understand you. The next time you feel alone, just remember you’re not and if needed you can always find someone to share your burden and listen, like me, I’m just like you :).

Stop trying to please everyone else, be selfish and be happy for you. Im the words of Ralph:

“I’m bad, and that’s good. I will never be good, and that’s not bad. There’s no one I’d rather be then me.”

Enjoy, Ross.

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